This simple question has been
asked over the ages and has issued various responses which has set many lives
on the pathway to greatness and bliss and at the same time plunged many into
the depths of darkness and gnashing of teeth. But it was not so from the
beginning.
Many ladies wait with strained
ears and aching hearts for this question but never hear even the faintest sound
of it - at least not yet. While many young men wish to ask this question but
never find their voice because they have not found their feet – at least not
yet, but it was not so from the beginning.
So many young people over many
generations, times and seasons have spent their lives waiting, hoping and
praying for a time that seem not to come, the saddest part being that they wait
unprepared. It will be to some like the student in the exam hall that never had
time to prepare for his exams, because he spent his time waiting. And to others
it will be like a farmer waiting to harvest crops from his farm when he never
spent time sowing – Oh how long will that “waiting” be? For at the end he will
harvest nothing but weeds. It was not so from the beginning.
The question now is how was it
done in the beginning?
FOR MEN ONLY
In the beginning God said ‘It is
not good for man to be alone, I will make a help meet for him (Gen 2vs18)’. Now
for the young man, God who has made you know that it is not good for you to be
alone and he made it his responsibility to make you a help meet for you, but
still he has an assignment for you.(find that in Gen 2).
For every young man is a garden
to tend to; a group of animals to give direction to their lives and purpose to
their existence as you give them names, you shape their destinies, you are able
to do this when you recognize your leadership position over them and as you
shape their lives by giving them names, you define your relationship with them.
In the process of His work, Adam and God did
not find a helper that was right for him and so God caused him to sleep. Young
men (Christian men) could you please allow God to cause you to sleep like Adam?
It is then that you can allow him “make” an help that is right for you. Sleep,
sleep, sleep, young man sleep, and let God make her for you.
We go about searching around,
with the scripture in Proverbs……that he that findeth a wife findeth a good
thing. The truth is, no matter how much you search; you will find nothing until
the Lord has made her. But if you will sleep and let God work on you, you will
we wake up and find her right in front of you. By sleep I mean finding rest in
the Lord your God, trusting Him completely, and not to distract yourself from
His work for searching prematurely. Jesus said watch and pray that you enter
not into temptation. Yes “watch” but don’t forget to pray, many have forgotten
to pray and have found themselves preys to strange women. The business of
saying these words “will you marry me?” must be a partnership between you and
God, where your duty is to trust God completely and drown yourself in His
assignment for you, investing in yourself and in your future, knowing and
working towards your God-given visions and goals, sharpening your leadership
skills until God awakens you to find the help that is right for you. Who He has
been preparing all this while to help you achieve those visions and goals He
has given you.
FOR LADIES ONLY
Hello ladies, thanks for reading
through the column for men only, it is now an open secret that 90% of the
reasons you do the things you do is related to the topic “will you marry me?”.
Yes you spend time/money making your hair, painting hands and feet, eyes and
lips and lots more. Well, that may not be a crime, but it is not the type of
preparation we are talking about. We speak of an adornment which is of the
Spirit.
Sometimes I wonder how ladies,
even Christian ladies, with artificial hair, artificial eye lashes, artificial
nails, artificial skin colour etc – hope to attract real men. No, no, no, you
will only attract artificial men. Yes, men with mock proposals, borrowed cars
and shoes. It was not so from the beginning.
Let us go back to the beginning.
In Gen 2, God Himself took up the responsibility to “make” the woman, “I will
make …” it is the business of God to prepare you for marriage, but the problem
is that many Christian ladies will not let God, they spend time panting and
waiting, forgetting to invest in their spiritual, academic, economic and social
lives. The period of GOD making the woman is the time in her life when she goes
all out to add value to her life – first of all to get closer to that God that
has the responsibility to make her develop a working relationship with God
where you will hear Him clearly on what He will have you do with your life.
Secondly, you spend your time
investing in yourself, acquiring skills, developing yourself. Many homes have
been shattered because the woman knows not how to cook, or even carry out
domestic chores at home. The book of proverbs tells us about the virtuous
woman. Spend your time becoming like her, you cannot do this alone, but need
the help of God, your maker.
Before you give a positive answer
to the question “Will you marry me?” make sure it is not for the wrong reasons.
Many people marry for the wrong reasons and this leads to a life of endurance,
instead of enjoyment.
Even when you get to be asked
this question, it is not an end in itself – but the beginning of a journey with
God in prayers, where He directs you on the right answer to that question. Do
not be in a haste to answer, do not be deceived by what you see , for many have
come into the church pretending to be God’s children but truly are wolves in
sheep clothing, and mind you, not every born again brother can be your husband,
there is one that God has made right for you. Allow God show you that one.
It is my earnest desire and prayer
that none of the daughters of Zion or the sons of God will make a mistake at
the junction of marriage, but that all will be led by God, the author and
finisher of our faith to a life of bliss.
